The Mind Of A Moron

Here’s another.

It’s been a while…here you go.

Homework or any work really is like a sliver you don’t want to pull out.

You know you’re better off if you pull it our right away, but that doesn’t matter.

“I’ll just leave it there, eventually it will solve itself”, But it didn’t did it?

Now your hand is infected, and it’s twice as hard to get out the blasted sliver. Man am I ever jealous of people who took their slivers out early.

So now it’s a critical decision, to pull out the painful sliver, or just amputate your hand, and fail the course. Sure it’s painful, and I don’t quite know the logistics of growing a new hand, but that would be easier…

note: I’m thinking of starting a text only blog, no videos, pictures, etcetera, just text, this will force me to work on more stories like this…ps. my studies are going well

So we had talent show at school I figured why not enter, stage time is stage time right?

It wasn’t really the best show, I was feeling sick so I wasn’t as animated as I should have been, and I did a few jokes I shouldn’t have done.

At least it’s a fun little clip to get you up to speed of how I spend my time.

(I think there is some profanity, just once or twice, not excessive, but you might want headphones)

YouTube Link

More updates:

• FWR is on hiatus, I’m going to try and focus on the idea show. It just hasn’t been getting the attention it should and I think I can use my time to create other better videos
• I have a feeling a potential employer might be reading this so, “Hello”.

Bonus: Cannibals. the idea show

Feedback always.

There I was ready to buy my coffee from the cafeteria and the lady at the till chimed in “$2.50 minimum for debit”.

“Oh common the coffee is $2.10″ I uttered under my breath. “Okay I replied.” Frantically I looked around for something to add to my purchase that would push me just over the top. I grabbed the nutrigrain bar, surely it wouldn’t cost much. Well it turn out is was a dollar. Now I was pissed off, it was time to formulate a plan.

I started drinking my black coffee as fast as I could, with the plan to top it back up on my way out (self-serve). I had every intent of getting my money’s worth. To top that off I was going to double cup it and take more creme and sugar (sweetener) than I needed. After all coffee costs them nothing this is where the real cost are. Maybe I’d also just happen to need two stir sticks to stir it.

“Sorry it’s declined again” the cashier said to the girl in front of me in the line.

“Here try this one” the girls said while handing the cashier another card.

After a few seconds the cashier replied “It’s been declined too”

Frustrated the girl picks up her phone to call the bank and find out what’s wrong with her account.

I step up and hand my debit card, but wait, 5-4-3-2-1

The girl chimed in “The bank said all of the systems for debit/credit cards and down in BC”

And them bam! My card got declined too.

So I got a free coffee but to keep it fair I didn’t re-fill it, took no creme or sugar, didn’t take a lid, and certainly didn’t double cup it. So I think it’s okay.

But then again, maybe I didn’t take any of those things because I was in such a rush to get out of there lest they solve the problem.

Best tasting lukewarm-half-full-black-bitter-lidless-coffee ever!

So… That’s how my day was.

A PSA on Pollution.

I think headphones are pretty much responsible for all the bad singing in the world these days.

Back before headphones singing went like this.

1. Hear a song
2. Like the song
3. Memorize the lyrics
4. Sing the song to yourself
5. Listen to your own voice and adjust it appropriately
6. If you really suck you hear that, and stop singing

Headphones changed all that. Now people

1. Listen to a song with headphones in
2. Sing along
3. Hear the actual singer’s voice in the headphones while they sing
4. Assume they themselves are good at singing, because while they sing pleasant sounds are heard (due to the headphones)
5. No feedback for voice adjustment or shame is given
6. Shitty singing perpetuates itself

That’s why everyone thinks they are better at singing than they actually are.

I know I said I would stop cross posting, - changed my mind. (but I will start getting more stuff here as well)

YouTube Link | Revver Link

I bought myself a drawing tablet and got around to installing the software today (it came two days ago). So far I’m really liking it, that picture above is my first try with it and I have to say what took only a few minutes on the tablet would have been so much longer in analog life (draw on paper, fine-line, scan, clean up, close lines, color). As a get used to it I think I will get better, until a few weeks from now when the bottle neck stops being the tablet and starts being my artistic abilities.

The plan is to start drawing cartoons again as well as other schematical (not a word? oh well) things to make life a little more visual.

Side note: I think I’ll stop posting the FlatWorldReport here as there is no sense in double posting it every time, just goto the main site. I’m going to try to do some more writing (like the piece below) and get cartoons as well as idea shows flowing.

That’s right I’m just reposting this from FlatWorldReport.com

YouTube Link | Revver Link

I tried to go back to the roots a bit, feedback is welcome.

• For people that can fly is it a lot of work, like a constant push-up, or is it easy?
• It would suck to be able to fly without invincibility cus then people would just throw rocks at you till you fell (like I’m sure many children do to seagulls)

I think you’ll like this one, I’m happy with how it went. I believe it’s a step forward. (Which is something I have been sorely lacking recently)

So I actually finished two videos today but one (that I really like) will come tomorrow.

Today you get the one that when people saw it they called me retarded (check it out of MetaCafe to see the comments). Maybe it’s not my best work eh.

Oh well you get to see it regardless.

So yeah I messed things up like the outdoor lighting, and maybe it was just a bad idea.

One other thing, I find it hard to get high ratings on video sites, and it annoys me that it doesn’t show distribution of votes eg if my videos average a 3/5 is that made up of half 1’s and half 5’s (cus that’s way better to have some hate and some love then all medium [yeah the math is off but point the same])….

Talk to you tomorrow.

So first things first The FlatWorldReports right now, they’ve been shitty. I can do better and I haven’t been making a conscience effort to improve and it shows. I will not release another until it is shows marked improvement.

So far this involves:

• Spending more time writing to get better ideas and a tighter script
• Using more cuts, camera angles ect to keep the pace up, making the news snappier, and more engaging

Also I’m continuing working on some ideas shows and having fun with them. In case I forget to mention this later I want to say openly I’m heavily influences by ZeFrank in filming style [for the coming idea shows]. It makes it a lot easier to keep attention and compensates for having only one person (it almost feels like a conversation between people).

Anyways this is part update part manifesto so if I publicly say something it will make me work that much harder.

This is the first edition of the idea show and I’m quite happy with it. Let me know what you think.

A few people mentioned that it went a bit long - true (maybe I should have cut a few out).

Something else I wish I mentioned in the video is SEND ME YOUR END OF THE WORLD POSE PHOTO to explosivo AT gmail DOT com and I’ll make a reel/vid of them. While I don’t think I have the following to get many but it would be fun to see other people’s poses or even do an end of the world shoot with more folks.

So yeah this is the idea show and I hope it will keep coming back, it was fun to make.

Revver Link

or watch it on youtube

Oh yeah, it’s here. (revver link)

Official Flat World Report Site

Watch it on YouTube

I wasn’t very happy this one. I’ll try harder next week.

It’s been a while since I’ve shown where I am so I figured I would post up a more recent audio clip of my standup. So here me have me standing, talking on a stage about a week ago.

I’ll just post it with the inpage player.

So yeah this isn’t the best show but it’s a taste of what I’m up to.

Other notes on what I’m up to:

• I owe you a Flat World Report
• I think I’m going to do a FWR Vancouver Edition
• I still need to start my Idea show
• As per the last post I’m going to look into starting a charity

I have about 10 more days of holi (it seems to me to say days of holidays is just redundant), so I better get cracking.