The Mind Of A Moron

Oh wow it just occurred to me, after Christmas before New Years are the 5-6 days (depends if you count Christmas itself) of freedom.

Because Santa can’t punish us for what we did last year, and he’s already given us gifts this year.

So for example if I now went and killed, or even maimed someone that would have been bad in the year 2005 but Santa is only allowed to consider what you’ve done in 2006 next Christmas when it comes to what gifts you get.

So enjoy your days of freedom, they last until New Years… and Santa can’t do a thing about it.

While the rest of the family was at church I got started on some Christmas cartoons, I’m not really sure what to think of them. The art was kinda rushed, and I don’t even know if they are good enough for me to promote to the Buried Under Air label.

I welcome opinions, keepers or not?

By the way in case anyone is interested to know (and why shouldn’t you be) I am actually starting to amass a large number of cartoons that I don’t end up using, about 5 or so are fully done then dropped, but I have a ton of ones I did halfway then decided not to finish. Someday I am going to put all of those up as lessthanbright.com.

Without further delay here are my Christmas cartoons

While watching a badly done presentation (not that I haven’t given any myself) it occurred to me how useful the ability to puke on command would be.

Here are the basic benefits:
1) Instant tension breaker
2) Easy to embarasse whoever was the focus of attention before you puked
3) A simple yet effective insult to people, sights, or cooking.

But here is the clincher (as long as nobody knows you can puke on command)

4) Nobody will be mad at you, because puking is supposed to be involuntary, so you get all the satisfaction of saying you suck, you’re ugly, or you smell, without any repercussions.

(doesn’t that look just look ugly 4 reasons, I didn’t even know things where allowed to have four reasons, I though every logical action had 3 reasons, well I guess I’ve proven myself wrong)

Clearly this is a valuable skill, something I hope to one day attain.

This is a real quick note, but the potential is huge.

I was thinking the covers for porn movies could be holograms, (quick guess at what would be animated). I’m sure if someone saw two movies one with a hologram preview and one without , well you can imagine which one would be picked.

If you know me you will understand that I am very protective of my ideas and incredibly IP conscious.

But sometimes I get ideas that are out of my means and I’ve decided why not share them with the world. Maybe someone can run with it (and if you can throw some cash my way please).

So here we go, my idea of the day:

I think we should be able to order coffee by color, the amount of cream and milk all affect the color of coffee differently and weak coffee is naturally lighter (and would need less cream to get to the desired taste and color). This is why it would work on many different coffees, no matter what kind of coffee you have once the desired color was reached it would taste good.

I figure they could embed these colors on a card (maybe even with your gift certificate) and it would be like taking a paint chip to the hardware store, you just give it to them and they match it up, and give you your drink.

So if you work in the coffee industry and what to be on the cutting edge or flavor technology this is for you, for everybody else, well I dunno.

So I know everybody is wondering why haven’t I been posting more, I’m sure you all want as much of my personality as possible (ok exaggerating a bit), and I just haven’t kept up to par.

Well here is the problem (and I have already explained this to some) I only have about 10 minutes of personality a week, that means if I see you only once or twice a week than that’s fine, there are enough fresh ideas in my mind to keep me going. But once I exceed 10 minutes of interaction with someone a week, there’s nothing new. That is basically the system I had in place and things were quite well balanced, life was good.

But, I then starting this blogging business, well now people read my stories before I see them in person, this erodes my weekly 10 minutes of personality. This leave me with nothing new to say to people and I just sit in silence more than ever, if I start to tell a story I often get a “yeah I read about it”.

So in short I will continue to share on this blog I just want everyone to realize the sacrifice I make in the hope that you can laugh to yourself about how moronic I am.